sometimes i wish life would just let me go, let me float to where i need to be. that it would peel away all the waiting the pain and the time spent hurting. but then i guess if that happened i wouldn't exactly be the same person would i?
i want to float. to feel every part of me separated from the reality of the day. weightless but not lifeless, calm. still. this is all i want. to be part of the floating ever-moving tide, streaming in out and over. touching only what i want and simply feeling the rest with my soul.
if floating away would help me, i would be gone. if i knew that to be a weightless lifeless soul was happiness, freedom and fulfillment i would already be gone. but i don't know. how can you possibly know.
here i have friends. in the weightless i have nothing not even life. so how is that better.
this is what keeps me wishing. the possibility that floating is not what it seems. that life has more to give.
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